- Jen Carrington, My Word For 2016: Wholehearted
When I started July + August, someone asked me, how different would it be from my old blog? (wait, did you have another blog before? Yes I did).
My answer was, I wanted to step away from typical fashion/beauty blogging that I had in mind back then.
I started blogging around 6 years ago. My old anonymous tumblr had always felt like me, my happy place, where I shared my favourite pictures and thoughts. I didn't have much following, but what I felt when I was writing it was pure creative freedom. That blog was who I was.
Some time after that I also found Bloglovin, and fell in love with the world of fashion bloggers. I thought I'd never be one of them, but they inspired me to keep dreaming big. I still follow some of those girls!
When I stepped away from my tumblr one day, it felt like I lost an important part of my soul. I was confused because I wasn't able to find any other creative outlet and fulfillment. I kept scrolling Bloglovin though, and having struggled a bit, I've decided to take the leap and to start a fashion blog on my own. So...
I'd been doing it for around a year, but it has never felt right. I tried to be like those who had inspired me, felt that I had to try to fit in and to follow a certain pattern, and thus I'd never found my true blogging voice. I feel like I started a fashion blog out of reasons that were far from transmitting the real me, and it didn't work out. I ended up not being able to differentiate myself, and reaching to people wasn't as easy as you'd think it is. To me, following wasn't about being popular, it was more about talking to someone and being heard, but instead I felt like I wasn't reaching to anyone and felt even more lonely. Overall, it was kind of a draining experience, so I decided to end it.
Back to the beginning of the post, I want J+A to be my website rather than my blog. I want it to be me, and I also want to stop expecting to turn into a glamorous persona just because I have a blog. In short, I want July + August to be a creative outlet where I'd be able to speak from my heart. I also want to step away from regular posting schedule because I don't want to feel pressured to pour content just to keep up with the calendar. I still love outfit posts though, and I still want to do them from time to time, but it won't be the main focus. Speaking about the real me, I've been thinking about ways to incorporate some real life struggles that are going on behind the scenes, and although it is scary and is a completely new ground, I hope to find a way for this to work out.
Now when I'm writing it, I'm telling myself that it is a creative journey, and it is completely okay to start on different projects as you try to find your own voice, and it's not unusual to be afraid when you're starting something new. So here we go!